How great thou art

Wow great sermons during both weekend services! The conclusion of the Paul as a Trailblazer for God and Rev. Dennis Lee's Sword of the Spirit! Lots of lessons to learn from both these sermons. Both of them are really relevant to me as of right now i'm seeking my calling from the Lord and tho i'm still a little unsure of what He's calling me to be or to do, to be a teacher, preacher or evangelist. But one thing common is surely all 3 callings need a devotion to the Word of God. From the Word of God is where a teacher draws his lessons from, from the Word of God is where preachers find the fire to instruct others and from the Word of God is where evangelist breath the conviction and truth to non-believers. So there must be more hunger than ever in the reading of the Word of God from now on!

Victor came on Saturday, tho he did not come back to Christ and decided to remain on his own path, i believe that one day when everything comes crashing down and the void in his heart becomes bigger and bigger, he would come back to God. Just like the prodigal son. And i'm sure that God with open arms will receive him. But as for now i'm gonna keep praying for him! Wow certainly my prayer items is getting longer and longer which is good!

My cousin came for the children's evangelistic party and he did learnt something about God tho its just a tiny bit. But still he expressed alot of enthusiasm about wanting to come back. I hope that God will continue to capture his heart. Also, I find my faith rising, i'm beginning to share much more about God to my parents and tho they're still a little stubborn i believe that layer by layer their hardened hearts are breaking down and surely God is at WORK!

Everything's so exciting in my life right now much more exciting before i came to know Christ. I think i heard is once before, "Christians have no life" well i guess they're absolutely wrong! Christians have much more life than them who belongs to the ways of the world, in fact, we have eternal life in Christ Jesus! lol maybe if someone says that to me next time i'm just gonna say that back and probably give myself a chance to evangelise wahaha.

Headlines

As i read the papers each day more and more youths are making the headlines. I think i'll start a scrapbook and paste all these news in it as a reminder to the burden of my generation. For a couple of months my BOMG has been nameless. Today i finally wrote "Youths" on it because it finally occurred to me that that's my burden that God has put in my heart.

Today i was challenged by the enemy that if i continue to walk this path, death will be at the end of it. But my future is in God's hands and not the enemy's. It gave me some thoughts tho, surely i'll meet up with opposition someday if i would continue to preach the Gospel to youths but i'd rather not think bout it anymore because it can turn out to be quite scary.

I guess God knows every of my desires and wants. Get a job, get married, have children and be a good father, simple dream as it is but thats the very desire of my heart. If God's plans for me is different then His will be done. Like the truth that sounds so ironic especially when you've met with difficulties of life, God's plan will always prosper you and not harm you. But the truth is the truth no matter how ironic it gets and i'll hold on to it. Praise the Lord!

in my life, Your Will be done.

Mighty to save!

I really must thank God for the burden of youths which has been growing and growing since i became a Christian. I guess God has put different burdens in different hearts. I was heavily burdened for the past few days praying for the youths in Singapore who have yet to know Christ and that with Christ they can have a friend to really confide in of their various problems. Youths are falling into all kinds of sin, falling victims to all kinds of problems and crimes. God has shown me so much in so many different perspective and happenings. How can i not carry this burden?

Yes. today heavily burdened. I usually take "walks" when i feel this way. Walking around Toa Payoh's 3 neighbourhood schools and void decks in search of youths. Often through these trips i get to see how the secondary school kids are doing. Even more often my heart was more burdened by what i observed. And i just felt so helpless even when i have decided to bring forth God's Word to them. I found it very difficult to muster enough faith and courage and excuses will come which prevented me from preaching to them. "Wah they like gangster liddat later kena beat up", "they are lower secondaries will they understand?" and i often went home defeated and discouraged.

Today was not much of a difference except probably near the end of the trip. I was saddened by the fact that i just cant find any youths hanging out in void decks, i saw a group of secondary school girls but i shun them because i thought that it might be very hard to relate to them. I kept praying for the Holy Spirit to guide me but i didn't hear any instructions. After the third secondary school's neighborhood i felt like going home because my house was round there. Then I felt that i should not give up so soon and continued to pray for guidance. I felt urged to move to the neighborhood ahead.

There was a street soccer court and playground and i saw lots of youths there. But i was attracted to a group of ordinary secondary school boys that were playing some kind of "Blind catching" on the playground. I began to pray for courage and faith and guidance. And finally i plucked up enough courage and asked them if they could stop their game and answer a question. "Where would you think you will go if you were to die in an accident tonight?" I found out that out of the 6 there, 1 was a Christian and 1 was a Catholic and the others were free thinkers. They look kinda like what i look in sec 3. plain ordinary.

Thank God that he gave me a group of easy bunch of kids. I preached the Gospel to them using the John 3:16 message emphasizing abit on the seriousness of hell and the John 3:16 diagram the church usually uses. Praise the Lord for they have such receptive hearts. During QnA i managed to answer their questions but i tried not to give a definite answer to the Catholic's faith because i myself do not know much yet. I must really thank the Holy Spirit for guiding me in the preaching and answering of questions because to be honest i didn't prepare myself much this time round. After everything i prayed for them and i asked if anyone wanted to accept Jesus Christ into their hearts. 3 of the 4 free thinkers put up their hands! i was kidna shocked but elated. i led them each personally thru the sinner's prayer and asked them the question again and all 3 said "Heaven". Praise the Lord for 3 lost sheeps were found! I committed them to their Christian friend to bring them to his church.

What a great experience! I believe that God is preparing me for tougher youths up ahead and i must carry this burden on and continue to grow in faith!

I cant help but shout a word of THANKSGIVING!!

I got my first half month's pay on saturday and whoopiee! a lil bit more and it'd be half the amount reached for development fund! But then again i think i'm giving this amount to my parents first to help pay for bills around the house.

I really must thank God for i did not earn this amount of money but i have taken it from the Lord who has blessed me with it. Looking back it's been a great journey with God on this little mission of Development Fund! Just months ago i've put down the amount that i felt God wanted me to give and tho its not a great amount compared to the adults, but its still quite a big sum for me that i'd never achieve just by my own savings. Haha praise God for that step of faith that He would provide. I knew that such a amount wouldn't just drop from the sky so i kinda decided that i would probably get a job during my holidays to earn it. But nothing honorable about this, they were kinda in a hurry to collect pledge forms and it just occurred to me like this: "Aiyah just write and trust God that u would find a job during holidays".

But the true adventure really started after i pledged. Of coz it wouldnt be adventure without much action in it. It just so happens that "action" came in the form of spiritual attacks. Now, a walk with God isn't always sweet and peaceful and all that. Theres a constant warfare going on between the spirit against the flesh and enemies. And during last couple of months i went thru several spiritual attacks that was quite serious that many a times i thought i'll just stop going to church. One of the weapon used by the enemy was the development fund. Because the amount was something that i could never achieve, serious fear came into me. "What if u're not gonna find a job." lol thinking back all i could do now was to laugh at the enemy because truly God has given me the victory.

Amidst my anxiousness i was often in prayer. As my holidays draws near, suddenly so many "opportunities" came up. We had a module on creating mobile games and there was a competition going on. Our lecturer commented that our game was really good but i dont know why we werent involved in the competition. During studio project, another lecturer said that our games might be chosen for a company that puts games in in-flight computers on commercial planes. We were called back during the first week of holidays to give the presentation again to him and there were serious rumours that we might be chosen because a lot of lecturers are commenting that our game was good. But it all ended up as a "justification" of marks. So that kinda shatter my hope of "money dropping from the sky".

I prayed for a job, and i thought i heard life bookshop bishan. Lol it sounds funny and it is when i first heard it. It took me a lot of courage and faith for me to go. I probably wasted too much time doubting God and when i finally went, there was no answer after i submitted my form. Oh yes, fear strikes again. In a desperate move, i began looking into classifieds. I saw this small ad. 6pm-6am $73 per day. I was like wooo my dream job, i've always wanted to work night shift. My parents were really shocked because i've never worked before and now they suddenly see their son so eager to work for 12 hours. night shift summore.

Was it out of fear? I often wondered. At first yes, out of desperateness but later on i realize that nope it wasn't because of fear. It was zeal. A zeal to accomplish God's work. Next question. So is it using your own strength to accomplish a God-sized mission? I used to think yes and i became quite ashamed of it and often tell friends(even from church) that i worked for fun and experience. But slowly as i see God in this matter the more i think that it wasn't from my own strength at all! It was the zeal and faith that i put in from the moment i wrote the pledge till now working with the strength and motivation of God every single work day.

With God it is no wonder that i enjoy work so much compared to those new employees like me who just started work. With God it is no wonder that the people there for some reason likes me alot and can't stop talking good bout me until i have to pray against pride. With God it is no wonder that even though i worked 12 hours night shift i still manage to go home with a smile and found strength to sing praises as i walked home in the wee hours of morning.

I cant help but shout a word of THANKSGIVING!!

Spirit touch Your church

As each day goes by, it is a day nearer to the rapture. Only one song keep ringing out in my mind this week and it was Spirit touch Your church.

Lord we need Your grace and mercy
We need to pray like never before
We need the power of the Holy Spirit
To open Heaven's door.

Spirit touch Your church, stir the hearts of man
Revive us Lord with Your passion once again
I want to care for others like Jesus cares for me
Let Your reign fall upon me

Lord we humbly come before You
We dont deserve of You what we ask
But we long to see Your glory
Restore this dying land

Praise the Lord for a heart which has grown cold to the lost souls out there to be filled with compassion once again. We truely need to start praying like we never did before for the lost souls out there.

Stir our hearts Lord, stir our hearts to be children of light in this dying land..

thief in the night

"But the day of the Lord will come like a thief. The heavens will disappear with a roar; the elements will be destroyed by fire and the earth and everything in it will be laid bare." 2 Peter 3:10

I remembered what my pastor said a couple of weeks ago that some scholars think that Jesus would come back in the next generation. It spurred me on to read more about the rapture and to read the book of revelations. It's been exciting and also sometimes puzzling so far. But one thing i am sure of. Time is really short. I dont know how people consider time but a couple of decades to spread the Word of God to the remain populations of the earth and to tell people about the saving grace of Jesus Christ seems kinda short.

However the most saddening question is that when rapture comes, will my family and friends come to know Christ by then? As i was reading Luke 17:34, "I tell you, on that night two people will be in one bed; one will be taken and the other left. Two women will be grinding grain together; one will be taken and the other left." Here is my vision of this, a family is eating dinner together, the child was taken up, the parents left behind. In a blink of the eye, gone. What would they feel? Probably just like those parents who lost all the children in a accident all of a sudden. But what is this? This isnt some accident or tragedy. The children entered the Kingdom of Heaven and the parents left to go thru the Great Tribulation. It even seems like the tables are turned. The parents are in the tragedy not the children. What would the child think or feel? He'd probably think that if only he could've shared the gospel more eagerly with his parents before that happens. If only...

I guess we're really in the last hours of the last days now. God, spur me on, to see my family saved and enter Your kingdom of Heaven...

Work work!

Hoo~ Just came from work and i'm still feeling so full of energy despite 12 hours of work! I guess God is over-sustaining me. But thats goooood! If i were to drop asleep i'd probably not update my blog for like another couple of days.

Work's been super duper great. Tho tiring its enjoyable. Wow am i kidding? Nope! 12 hours work in a handphone factory is fun. Not kidding. oh and no sarcasm too. The people there are super good to me for some reason and all of them are super outgoing. Although most of them are aunties they are funny and talkative. I sort of got adapted to people calling my new name. The malay aunties thought that Chen Thong was too hard, Benedict was too long so they settled for Ben. The chinese aunties keep calling me xiao di or ah di. Haha i dont know why but i cant help but saying that they dont look like they have children at all. super cute. Thank God for them life's been really good there. With them around i probably can go another 12 hours.

As for myself i'm always in my reserve state never talking unless talked to. But i always make sure i have a smile on my face to show that i'm not a spoil sport or anti-social. They keep asking me questions tho bout school and family. But one thing i need to control is pride there, often i'll get praises from them for learning fast and doing stuff fast and different from the other youths there. I guess its another asian culture, always praise other's kid than praise your own kid. But then again i have to keep reminding myself that i must not seek the praises of man but of God, because i sometimes find myself doing things to obtain these praises and its not right. But may all the glory be to God.

Oright gonna continue with my 3/4 cereal 1/4 milk formula lol. and off to a good day's rest.

taste of hardship.

certainly not yummy. lol. But it's been an eye opener working in Motorola factory. I didnt realize the phone's camera could be so small. The people there are very kind to me and all of them are pretty talkative. Almost all of them are middle aged aunties working to support their family. I really respect them man, working 12 hours night shift everyday is tough but its probably their love for their children and wanting them to have a better life that spur them on to continue working.

Actually it's not all that bad working there. Though the working hours are long the hours fly pretty fast especially when theres so much to do and so much targets to meet. We're making Razr2 V8s for the past 2 days and made almost 2 thousand sets lol which is probably enough to pay the employees for a couple of months. I was incharge of drilling the screws and its very fun but kinda repeative.

I'd probably work on for the remaining of my holidays and hopefully earn enough for development fund and a guitar (and probably a wii, if God permits.). Gotta start praying for the salvation of the workers there and targets to spread the gospel to!

Wow.

I got a job as a operator in Motorola Factory. Nope not phone operator but someone who assembles them. Lol it's so ironic, a few months ago i was making mobile phone games and putting them into Motorola phones and now i'm making the phone itself. Well it's kinda nice and all technical but i guess its working time is a lil killing. 6:30 to 6:30, pm to am. It definitely would screw up my body clock but hey its alll for the experience. I've always wanted to try working in a factory like Homer Simpsons cept that he works in a nuclear reactor. Lots of aunties and a handful of youths. I kinda look out of place there since most of them look like dropouts and have tattoos and piercings all over. Lots of people smoke there too even ladies. so i was like --> O[]0

I feel abit sad tho. I knew i didnt really consult God on this one. I jus jumped right in. Like a kid jumping into a pool. Lets just hope that pool is not a pool of cement. ouch that'd hurt. But i guess i'll just have to rely on God even more. If He wants me to leave then i'll leave, else there would be surely a reason why He wanted me to stay. However i might leave if my body cant take it tho i'm not gonna give it much thoughts because i'm quite determined on this one. With zero work experience i really hope i can adapt fast.

Ahh already i forsee alot of problems thats gonna come out. I've to work on saturdays twice this month and both fall on lifegroup weeks. This saturday. Oh my goodness. This saturday! I cant get leave because i have to work for 3 days first T_T Man i cant believe i have to leave early on life group week. What's more powderful is that the next day i have GCE at 8:45 and baptism. I think i'll fall as asleep as sleeping beauty once i reach home. lol.

Floodgates

Whenever we start feeling disappointed at God or start getting confused and irritated when something goes the other way we want it to be, the enemy strikes. I guess the number 1 truth i must continue to have in my heart is this: "God works all things for the good of those who love Him". How wonderful of God to equip us with the sword of the spirit. However the flesh cannot be taken lightly. When the floodgates are open, when our defense is wide open, the enemy always finds its way into our heart and cause his destruction. I'm not sure what we should do after that. I often see myself falling into sin or being hurt by deceit or plain disillusioned. I guess we must all recognize the spiritual attack when it starts and prayerfully ask for the Lord's help. How eager He is to deliver and rescue us. Thank God.

What a nice lesson from the Lord today. As baptism draws near, like Ps. Ben said, you will be under spiritual attacks. I guess it's a really good time to strike when all of a sudden i was confused at how God works. I was quite sure i heard God telling to find this job at a particular place and then i went there filled up the form and nothing happened. Was wondering if i heard wrongly or just my flesh playing tricks on me. I didnt even know when i was feeling disappointed. Yea, what a nice opportunity for the enemy to strike. I shan't talk about his lies or whatever he used but i must really thank God for this lesson. Without this i'd probably be hurt by some kind of dumb lie or falling into sin.

w00t how great is the Lord my God, the Teacher and the Redeemer!

The Great Battle Ahead

Exactly 1 week left to baptism! Really excited and yet somehow worried. Should i tell my parents? What would they say? Would they be angry? Well there could be a dozen more thoughts coming in but no matter what, i've my mind set on getting baptised in obedience to God.

I'm sure a great battle lies ahead of me. A battle that would put my faith to the ultimate test. Would i stand up for Christ in my family of relatives? Am i ready to be looked down upon by those so close to me? It just so happens that i'm the only grandson and all traditional responsibility of a guy rest on my shoulders. I'm sure my relatives would bombard me with words that will be as sharp as swords. I'm sure that who i am will pull down the reputation of my family. I'm sure that my own family will look at me with disappointment. I'm sure that i'll be criticized before a panel of aunties that would judge me unworthy as grandson. Will my parents turn away?

But who am i to contemplate the future? My future lies in the hands of the Lord. So what if theres a great battle in front of me when the Lord has already given me victory? Praise the Lord! May my faith be strong when the time comes. Who knows what will happen when the Spirit moves? I'm sure with the Helper, all things are possible! Who knows? My relatives might even accept Christ when i preach my faith to them!

Because He lives, i can face tomorrow.
Because He lives, all fear is gone.
Because I know He holds the future,
And life is worth the living just because He lives.