Jesus You're my SUPERHERO!

Jesus you're my superhero
You're my star, my best friend
Jesus you're my superhero
You're my star, my best friend

=D lol my cousin's staying with me for a week. At first i thought, aiyah my quiet time's gonna get disrupted again. But thank God not only it's not disrupted but i managed to evangelize to him! He came for the church's children evangelistic meeting and came to know the Lord. I read him Noah's Ark from the Bible. Nope not directly from NIV but from CTKV (Chen Thong Kids Version) lol. Praise the Lord, he understood the story preeetty well.

I really thank God for the work in his little life. He asked me today where is heaven and i said it's something we cannot see now. Then he asked when? i said when we die. lol then he asked how to see when we die? I said that if anyone believes that Jesus is the Son of God, when he die, he will go to heaven. Then he just exclaimed: "I believe!". lol i'm pretty sure that God's working mightily in him with such cute faith!

He's super excited. I'm super excited. We're super excited. Because we just sang Jesus You're my Superhero for a few times and it's just so fun to praise God with him! He's asking me to read him another story tonight and i think i'll be reading Adam and Eve from the CTKV.

New experience.

I should be doing work but i cant get myself into the mood especially i've not done my quiet time yet. Grr school work = /

Saturday was great. Aunty Ruth preached about building a strong foundation upon God's Word. It spoke alot to me because somehow i felt that God already taught me that and the sermon was like a revision to me. At the end of it i just felt committed again to continue to strive in God's Word.

Then it came to Lifegroup. The sharing was great as always, our internal response towards God and His unstoppable love. And then to worship. It was my first time and i felt that i screwed up alot. I kinda messed up big time on some parts because i'm not sure whether to die down or not. But the worst of all was that i kept forgetting to hold up the cords for Jerrold. I felt super guilty for that because he kept signaling to me and i kept forgetting again and again. At one point the music was off because of that. I don't know, even when it came for me to beckon the members to worship, i just felt so uneasy. Overall i felt kinda disappointed at myself even after Jeremy and Jerrold's comforting words.

I dont know. I became kinda down after that. Havta go home early to do some school work and was really glad that there was no one at home when i got back because it means early quiet time. I guess God saw how much disappointment i felt against myself and I was really glad that He pulled me thru it all(like He always does). I guess the most important thing He taught me once again was that it really isn't the result that matters but the journey i went thru. Sanctification, praying for songs, praying for a burden for the lifegroup, worship and praise. The Lord brought me through all that during that couple of weeks and i just felt that indeed it's the journey that really matters. Praise the Lord for this journey and this new experience =D

New.

Hoo~ what a day of packing. 2 more weeks and i'll be off to Pungol! Hmm am i looking forward? YES and a lil no. Yes because everything's gonna be new! New bed, new TV, new sofa, new everything! A lil no because the traveling time to anywhere will be 2 times longer = / But thats ok! I'll counter that with books and more mp3s.

But the one thing i'm super looking forward to is definitely having the whole room to myself! No more public computer in my room! Which also means earlier and more private quiet time! No more QTs past midnights! Ahh that'd be great man, guess i wont be waking up in the morning and find myself sleeping on my Bible anymore.

Okay now i'm super excited again thinking bout all the new changes. While packing stuff, we were (my dad and i) talking bout the bad people in the world. People who are unjust towards others just because they held authority or wealth and such. My dad threw me a question: "Wouldn't you think it's good to have a big war and wipe everything out and we can all start out again?" Lots of biblical stuff went thru my head but i decided not to say anything but give my signature sheepish laugh. I know he's asking me to voice a Christian view to it but i dont know why i didn't say anything.

Looking back, I probably would've said: "Yeap something like that would happen in the future. During what we call the Great Tribulation and at it's climax there will be the final battle "Armageddon", satan vs God and we already know whose gonna win. And after that God's gonna make everything new again."

He who was seated on the throne said, "I'm making everything new!" Rev 21:5

Search.

Yes. I finally got back to reading books. I guess all of a sudden computer games just stopped amusing me. Probably God's helping me to redeem my time and yes i thank God for that. First off i'm finally done with Wai Yin's 3 books and all i can say is they're really great and helped heaps (no. i didn't read all 3 in 1 go. i just managed to kick myself into finishing the last one =D) I started with Rachel's Tears which was about a girl who died during the Columbine High School Shootings. Not just any other girl, but a girl who knew God so intimately that even at her last breadth, she did not deny that shes a Christian. Tells me what Christianity is, at its very basic, Love the Lord, your God, with all your heart, with all your soul, with all your mind, with all your strength.

The second book was about God's nature. It was wonderful timing because at then i was wondering what the holy Trinity is, lots of facts and truths that helped me understand what 0.000000000001% of who God truly is. But i guess we can never fathom all of God's ways so 0.0000000000001% is still quite a huge number =0

The third and last book which i've just finished reading bout a week ago was A Glimpse Into Glory, a biography of Kathryn Kulhman. It was simply amazing tho i must really admit the tone was kinda strong in some kind of way. But her healing ministry just simply amazed me. This book and the book i'm currently reading (Wigglesworth, the complete story) just made me feel how God could really work thru someone to bring such powerful spiritual manifestations to the people out there.

I dont know but it just makes me look at the life i'm living now. I cant even be constantly be on fire for God. It just keeps fluctuating up and down, up and down like a wave. Committing my life and trust in Him today and doubt Him the very next day, bahh just like the man who is like the wave and yes he should not think he will receive anything from the Lord. But still looking at all my weaknesses, God dosen't give up on me and still managed to use me in some small ways and i thank Him for that. I'm not satisfied with what i am at now, i guess the search for God's heart goes on, in His Words and Works. One more plate of self-discipline please!

Waves ~

If i were to plot out my spiritual life on a piece of graph paper i guess it will look like a really wavy graph with lots of parabolas. I dont know but i just became so sick and tired of this kind of life. Sometimes i'm so high in praises on mountains speaking with God as if face to face, yet on other days of the week i can fall so deep down right into the valley of death.

Last week was a week where i reached the highest and yet also the lowest. In the beginning of the week i was so high up, never have i felt so broken and on fire and i began pleading to God that His Spirit may manifest in me so strongly. All until Tuesday. As i came before the Lord, i just dont know why i cant feel His presence at all. The next 2 days felt like i was in a spiritual desert, didn't even felt like doing my quiet time and all. It was really the lowest i've ever felt.

Bahh dont feel like describing it anymore but at the very end i just saw myself at the Y junction, the path that leads to the world and the other to God. Friday was a day of reconciliation and i was really glad that i was delivered and put back on the right track =D

Is my foundation strong?

It's been quite a whirlwind thru these 8 months ever since i came to know the Lord. So many things changed ever since and still are changing. The thing is, i felt that everything's going too fast. Have i learnt all that the Lord wants me to learn in this season? Have i missed out anything? I guess that's why God asked me this question, "Is my foundation strong?". I took weeks to think about this and today i dare to say to the Lord that, "Yes my foundation is strong, because my foundation is You Lord."

Probably it was because i felt that God is giving me a crash course thru everything. From who He is, repentance, fasting, evangelism, crying, reading of His word, praying, there's just so many things He brought me through. I on the other hand just felt like a little kid piled up with lots of presents from his father.

As i see people backsliding in the lifegroup i realize that "hey, i might end up like one of them someday". Not that i want to but i guess everyone faces trials and temptations. If my foundation is not strong i'll probably just fade away too. I dont know it'd probably like that little kid throwing all the precious presents away and running after something else.

So who is this little kid to receive all that was given to him? What makes him worthy in his father's eyes? Was he so greedy that he just kept asking his father for more? Who is he to his father?

It's never about this little kid. It's all about Father. It's all about Jesus.

i know the sins that i carry are forgiven,
i know the times spent on my knees are not wasted,
i know the tears i cried are bottled and kept,
i know the my prayers are heard,
i know the things of the future is is Your hands,
i know, i know because You are my Lord,
and i want my life to be all about You.

Truly, truly it's all about Jesus.