Begins with an ENCOUNTER.

Yes it all begins with an encounter. I've gotta keep remembering that, both in my life and in the life of others.

I feel that 3 things usually happens during an encounter, firstly, you get a revelation of God's holiness in all of His majesty. Secondly, you see the enormity of your sins against the holy God. Thirdly, most importantly, you feel God's love and forgiveness pouring into you despite the second point.

Well at least that was what happened to me. Something like that happened in Isaiah 6:1-7 too. This is the chapter in Isaiah which i read recently, i've not read the whole of Isaiah yet, just some parts here and there for reference. Okay so, this chapter is about Isaiah's commission, and it began with an encounter with God.

In verse 1, Isaiah saw the Lord seated on a throne, high and exalted, and the train of His robe filled the temple. Now that sounds pretty majestic to me. Let's look over to verse 2 and 3, Isaiah saw seraphs calling to one another, "Holy, holy, holy, is the LORD Almighty; the whole earth is full of His glory." So here we see Isaiah having an vision of the Lord's holiness in His majesty.

And then in verse 5, we see the prophet crying out "Woe to me! I am ruined! For I am a man of unclean lips, and i live among a people of unclean lips and my eyes have seen the King, the Lord Almighty." I guess it's like a spotlight shining on us, which suddenly made all our blemishes become so obvious. Isaiah saw the seraphs proclaiming "holy, holy, holy" yet he cant do that for he is a man of unclean lips!

Yet in verse 6 and 7, we see that one of the seraphs flew to Isaiah with a live coal from the altar and used it to touch his lips, saying, "See, this has touched your lips; your guilt is taken away and your sin atoned for." Tada! His iniquities are forgiven!

Praise God for encounters, in which we can see God's grace in action and that His reality just becomes so real. I guess it changes our lives in one way or another, in a big or small way.

Oh he hates the serpent alright.

He sure hates the serpent. Something we can all learn from?

Hunger, Desperation, Sacrifice.

I think it's like a cycle. Hunger produces desperation and when you're desperate for something, you'll be willing to sacrifice something to accommodate that thing you're hungry for. From hunger for God to hunger for fleshly lust, this cycle applies.

When you're hungry to satisfy a fleshly desire, you'll become more and more desperate for it if the temptation is not dealt with. Then, naturally you sacrifice something, your godly values, your relationship with God, your commitments to accommodate that desire.

But on the other hand, if you're hungry for God, you'll be desperate to have more of Him. Naturally you'll begin to give things up, your own will, time and desires just to serve and wait upon Him more.

I was challenged after hearing one of Cornerstone's P.S Yang's sermon, "Blessed are the hungry". It's an amazing and challenging sermon which makes you think how hungry you really are for the living God. I felt God asking me 2 questions after some reflections (after much repentance.). "What am i hungry for? For the things of the world? For the things of God? Or for God alone?" and "How hungry am i for Him? How much am i willing to sacrifice?".

"He has filled the hungry with good things but has sent the rich away empty" Luke 1:53

Who is knocking on whose door?

It's a wonderful vision that God gave to Emma today during worship, a vision where many people are knocking against this door, but soon many start to give up. In this dry season many are looking for a breakthrough in their lives, in their weariness, in their struggle against sins, in their school work. I guess we all start giving up at some point, when we feel that God dosent care, when we probably feel that we're not worthy for God, when we choose to go back to our vomit and dwell in condemnation. I myself have gone thru this so many times in my short Christian life. But i wonder, who is knocking whose door, really?

i guess many times when we need a breakthru, we begin knocking on God's door, but after awhile when it seems too tiring with the waves of our burdens keep hitting our back, we give up. I gave up many times in my fight against sins, lost hope in the sanctification process and went back feeling condemned. In times of weariness, when quiet time seems so dry and God dosent seem to be speaking, when prayer time was just a little above 5 minutes, I tried pressing in, but after a while i gave up.

Why dosent God answer? Or is He knocking at the doors of our hearts instead?

"Those whom I love I rebuke and discipline. So be earnest, and repent. Here I am! I stand at the door and knock. If anyone hears my voice and opens the door, I will come in and eat with him, and he with Me." Revelations 3:19-20

I thank God that i finally understand this, how i wish i would've understood this earlier, oh i forgot i was busy getting my character up to level so and so. God's been knocking for so long, and calling out to me. "Go and be accountable for your sins", "Go and install a filter on your web browser", "Stop playing computer games and spend more time with Me". When i finally open the door to Him, tada, breakthrough in sins and life. I guess sometimes it's really about letting Him into your life and grant you that breakthru, but before that you've gotta listen carefully and you've gotta unlock your door and turn the knob and let Him in and do His stuff.

Thank God for He is a patient God, He never stops knocking and waiting.

Have you got time for God?

I really thank God for dealing with me for wasting my time and life away on worthless things that i've been clinging to so stubbornly for so long. I kissed computer games and any form of electronic games devices goodbye almost 2 weeks ago and so far it's been great. At first, I wondered why God wanted me to give those up, even tho i dont really spend a lot of time on them. It led me to a lot of bargaining but until i surrender it, i'd really never know why. "God! 1 or 2 hours only waddd!", i remembered saying that.

But my focus is not on that, but on really what God taught me after i gave those things up. The biggest thing is that it opened the doors to a considerably great amount of time that can be devoted to Him. Now i've the time to practice guitar, listen to a sermon by Leonard Ravenhill, call somebody, pray, worship, read the Word and books and even to write my blog! Now that's what i call a time well spent.

Hmmm, what should our time with God really shows? Our relationship and love for God? So if we spend 1/2 hour a day doing quiet time, does that mean that God is only worth 2% of our lives? Wow if that was true, it'd be a really sad truth. Thank God it's not that way. Our relationship and love for God is something more than what time can offer. But then again, dont our love for God determines the amount of time we're willing to stay in His presence? So i guess i can deduce that, our time with God does not determines our relationship and love for Him but it's our love and relationship that determines our time with Him!

It's true we're not clocking up points here, but it'd be really embarrassing in heaven if Jesus would say to me, "Son, I've wanted to show you so much of My love for you, but you just dont have the time!"

Whatcha Lookin At?

"Let us fix our eyes on Jesus, the Author and Perfecter of our faith, who for the joy set before Him endured the cross, scorning its shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God." Hebrews 12:2

What a glorious command given by the author of Hebrews. God's been speaking to me about this and another verse in Romans alot. It seems to be perfect timing because i was wondering how long will this lil revival of mine last? And it seems to me that God is saying that if i fix my eyes on Jesus, the Author and Perfecter of my faith, it will last till eternity!

Now what does that mean, to fix our eyes to Jesus? It's certainly not carrying around an image of Jesus and keep staring at it all day long! But i guess it's really to keep our minds focus and keen on Jesus, what He did for us on the cross and the life He walked for His Father. For a long time now, i've been all along fixing my eyes on the wrong things.

Like fixing my eyes on myself, my own capabilities and frailties. In dealing with sin, all i can see is hopelessness in myself and i never seem to climb out of that pit. Now who climbs up a pit with his mind focusing on himself, thinking that he will fall again? Now, when i fix my eyes on Jesus, He is like the rescuer that's gonna get me out and when i fix my eyes on Him, all i can think of is "He's gonna get me out! YAY!". Same goes to personal revival, why fear that the fire will run out? why fear that i might fall back into indifference again? why fear this and that?

Fix your eyes on Jesus, and all these will strangely dim around you because you no longer look at yourself in all your weaknesses but you're looking at the Man who gave it all on the cross for you. His abundant grace and love will never fail to pick up as long as you keep fixing your eyes on Him.

"See, I lay a stone in Zion, a chosen and precious cornerstone, and the one who trusts in him will never be put to shame."1Peter 2:6

Sin.

It feels kinda weird but at the same time cool to hear sermons by someone who had already died. And you know what? God still can use those sermons to speak and poke. I guess it's what they call, leaving behind a legacy.

I've been hearing a lot on Leonald Ravenhill and all i've gotta say that, i'm convicted of so many things. It's like a great awakening at this point, to really measure up myself against the truth of God's standards and i cant help but find myself like a dwarf against His standards.

I think one of the biggest lesson i've learnt or have been really convicted of is how serious am i towards sin. Oh yes i hate sin, it makes me feel bad and guity and makes me dont wanna see God. But what should really be the reason to hate sin? "YOU SHALL BE HOLY, FOR I AM HOLY." There, nice and big right from the Word of God, and i've been oblivion to it or rather ignorant to it.

It's like that commercial from that radio station bout "hearing only the good stuff". How often do i read the Bible and go thru a certain verse like this, "God is love", and i'm all cuddly inside as i think bout His love, but when i go thru something like "go and sin no more", i'm like "okay, next line". It didnt hit me at all, that's the very thing Jesus commanded, to go and sin no more. He didn't say "go, try not to sin anymore" or "go and sin less", but "go and sin no more", fullstop. He sure is serious bout sin, so serious that He came to die for us that we may be set free.

I'm sure God is love, if not why would He ever send His Son to die for our sins? But is it always true that God loves the sinner but hates the sin? I think i still have to ask God prayerfully about that and to really go thru the scriptures on it. But one thing i'm sure of, it's wrong when that becomes an excuse for us to go about sinning thinking that God still loves us for that.

"Look ma, i'm sorry i was playing soccer in a muddy field and i got all my shirt dirtied with mud, i promise i wont do it again". "It's alright son, i'll wash it for you. *smiles*" And the Mom hands over a nicely washed shirt to that boy. The boy with his nicely washed shirt saw his football in the same muddy field and said,"Oh i cant resist it! I've just gotta kick that ball". Little did he know that his mom is right there looking. Now, I wonder how his mother felt? A hint of anger perhaps?

Price of Revival?

Lol, it seems funny, i was talking bout the song Everlasting God and there we sang it on the next day. But it was good, i really like that song as it really portray the truth about God being never weary and tired and is the defender of those who are weak. I just kept telling God that i'll wait upon You, i'll serve You in my time and stuff like that.

Okay, that was that. What really hit me was the worship+pre-service prayer. Since there was no sermons today because of the dvd presentation (which was not really edifying), the only way God moved was during that worship and prayer time. A call to prayer, thats what i felt through the week, and i realize it's really important to come hungry, hungry for God to move and revive us.

Prayer was really good. God spoke to me on holiness and on God's standard. I felt that even for myself before i really submitted to God, i was exposing myself alot to the world, almost flirting with it, not only that, there were still sins that i had to deal with. It didnt seem to me holiness was anything at all, or if it's something, a certain kind of standard, then i would've really lowered it to a point that i felt i was still "okay".

Which brings me to the next thing, God's standards. How often i compromise it, lowered them, trampled them. When self-consolation became "grace" and repentance was just "okay i wont do it again", no tears, no hard feelings, just "okay i wont do it again". When time was devoted to other things instead to the things of God, "aiyah, i play finish this round then i go do quiet time", "i watch finish this show then i go do quiet time.", "i finish surfing my daily lists of blogs then i go pray". And after all that, all i could concentrate on during quiet time was what i had previously done. Was all that even acceptable to the One who gave it all? The One who gave a 100% of himself to a generation that won't even give back 10%.

What is the price of revival? A couple of thousand dollars to get a revivalist stir up our emotions and go back into the week unchanged? Or is it by praying, interceeding, crying out, sacrificing your time, and a broken heart?

I really felt challenged by God. Last week was a great week of encounter, as i sow the seeds for godly habits, holiness, purity, righteousness and hungriness. I'm sure it's not gonna take overnight for them to grow, but i've gotta keep sowing and sowing that one day i may reap a harvest that will be acceptable to the Lord. Days will turn into weeks and weeks will turn into months and months will turn into years, and till the year of harvest comes, i need plenty of God's grace to live a life worthy of the price He paid.

Revival, how badly do i want it?

I dont wanna see revival. I want it. But no matter how much i want it i cant want it as much as God himself wants it and how He wants me to want it. It's been a exciting week, one of the best weeks for so long now. A week filled of God's grace and mercy, not like weeks of half-past faith and falling into sin bringing about hopelessness and of course, snuffing out of the revival fire.

Revival, revival, revival. It's hard not to hear it when it keeps shouting out from the inside of my heart. Oh yes, i want it very much, but just how badly? Just how much would i give up for a revival? How much time would i give to pray? Just when i think what i've typed sounds as if i'm doing everything by my own strength, i'd just like to say no. These are choices, sacrifices that everyone has to make at a point of time. Would i kneel down and ask God for a revival or would i just wait till God calls me to kneel down and pray?

I think most of us have come to a point of time when we sing Everlasting God, we were really sitting and waiting, doing absolutely nothing while expecting God to do all the work and grant us strength? I thought waiting upon God was serving Him, not serving Him as in ministry, but giving Him our time, in our daily walk with Him, conveying with Him, praying with Him. I dont think we're called to wait upon God like waiting for a bus, sitting in the bus stop, wishing that the bus would come REALLY soon because we're really bored and tired.

I think i sound really angry, but i'm not. I'm just kind of wondering why some things happen. Pardon me for the example i'm gonna use. When i was a non-believer, i was a buddhist and often had to use joss sticks in temples. I often see my dad having one whole bunch of them that he needs to get burning. He always manage to get the whole bunch burning by putting the whole bunch of them at the candle. But not all catch fire at the same time. Those nearer to the fire will of course catch fire first and slowly, joss stick by joss stick the whole bunch will start burning because the fire is passed on.

I guess that's what revival's gonna be like in the church. The fire has to come from God, like the candle flame, those who have the privilege of walking right before God, those who had been faithful and humble and hungry, boom! they're gonna be set a flame. The revival fire is passed on and on and on to every believer. But you know what? Some joss sticks just dont catch fire no matter how, as though the fire didnt reach it. Those are taken out, put near to the fire by themselves and soon they too will be set aflame. I dont think God will leave anyone out will He?

Love the Lord your God with all your heart with all your soul, with all your mind, with all your strength. Now that sounds like plenty of choices and sacrifices to me.